just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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