tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
