Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Randomize
