Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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