I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
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