One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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