this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a shit load of segways right now
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
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