she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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