If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
it's great music for shaving your balls
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
