bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize