i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
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