yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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