I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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