a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
You are a genius and a whore.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
