everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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