I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
