remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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