pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
