u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
i barfeds in our rink
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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