You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
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he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
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According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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