I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
