he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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