I'm drive I can fine osifer
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Randomize
