We're like a lot better than the average bears
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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