my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
