Well apparently he's into motor boating.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I fill condoms, not promises.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
