dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
