Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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