I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
