whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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