I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize