You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
