You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
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