if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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