According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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