You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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