Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
