I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
