I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
