come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
