i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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