My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
