I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
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