It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
