i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
