It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize