What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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