wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize