Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
