my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
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