I've blown a few things in my day
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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