Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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